Once upon a time, it was a dark and stormy night. Not a creature was stirring, not even a …* Hold it!!!
Who’s That Knocking at the Door? Somebody’s Ringin’ the Bell!
Slowly I turned … step by step … inch by inch.
“It Had to Be You,” I commented as Suzi crashed through the door.
“I’m Gonna Wash That Man Right Outa My Hair,” she cried.
“Jesus Christ — Superstar?!”
“The One and Only!”
“I told him We Can Work It Out. All You Need Is Love. I subordinated my life to him Eight Days a Week! He knew when we started I was a Paperback Writer!”
“Well, there you go! You two don’t speak the same language. Remember when you met him he asked, ‘Do You Know the Way to San Jose?’ You know they’re all Twits in Silicon Valley!”
Poor Suze. She thought Apple, Blackberry and spam were foods. She wrote on paper.
“I mailed him a letter. I told him It’s Now or Never. You’re Always on My Mind.”
“Right, and it got Returned to Sender.”
“I thought we had A Groovy Kind of Love.”
“Sorry, Suze; I haven’t heard Both Sides Now, but I know he’s thinking ‘She’s Under My Thumb.’ I have No Sympathy for the Devil.”
“I’ll Be Alone Again, Naturally,” she wailed. “I’ll Never Fall in Love Again.”
But, Suze, “There’s Got to Be a Morning After,” a “Bridge Over Troubled Water.”
And then Suzie said these amazing words: “You’re right! He Ain’t Nothin’ But a Hound Dog!”
Hallelujah!!
*(Overworked phrases and song titles lifted from Edward Bulwer-Lytton, The Beatles, Neil Diamond, Burt Bacherach, Elvis Presley, The Rolling Stones, Abbott and Costello, various musicals, fairy tales and George Frederick Handel)
I knew I had lost that loving feeling by the time I reach the end of your tale but you know, I couldnt stop believing!. (Nothing like the Righteous Brothers and Journey to keep things moving!)
EXCELLENT, Gianetta!! You have a future in bad writing! But you also write brilliantly, as evidenced by your blog and new book, which I just ordered! Can't wait to read it!
"It was the best of tomes, it was the worst of tomes." Cathy, if you wrote an entire book in the same style as your post, this is how it would open. And it would be a bestseller. Very funny.
Jerry! "Laugh, Laugh, I Thought I'd Die.*" THANK YOU!!!
Big hugs, Cathy
*The Beau Brummels
Loved it! Really bad, but funny.
THANK YOU, Sharon!! The songs just kind of suggested the plot - a bad plot!!
X, C
And don't forget the Rolling Stones, best rock and roll band of all times (beattles too of course).......under my thumb was one of my favs - I'll have to tell you my Rolling Stones story some time.........love ya!
Jeanette Oh yeah, this was great!
Hi, girlfriend!! The Stones may have been represented in there somehow, too! Would love to hear your story! THANK YOU for the positive reinforcement!!! Love, C.
Yes, you did represent the Rolling Stones with "Under my Thumb" one of my favorite Stones' tunes!, but when you listed who the groups were, you left the Stones out............
Duly amended! That's what friends are for!!
XO, C